Ugly Americans

I attended the Bruins game at Madison Square Garden North yesterday with the dino nuggets, with the Bruins facing off against the New York Rangers. The Rangers fans were out in force, as Bruins tickets are easier to score than just about anything around here. They were very helpful in directing Bruins fans who seemed lost or dioriented by dint of never having seen the inside of the new Garden.




They also corrected long-time Garden singer René Rancourt, who forgot the lyrics to the national anthem, chiming in with, "Let's go Rangers (clap, clap, clap-clap-clap)." They helped Bruins fans survive the oh-so-boring and meaningless celebration of the 50th anniversary of Bruin Willie O'Ree breaking the NHL color barrier, serenading us with more entertaining Rangers chants. Unfortunately, some of the fans were overcome by excitement, and had to be assisted out of the arena.



We had seats in the very last row of the house, requiring the occasional use of oxygen tanks to supplement the thin air. I think that the thin air went to the Rangers fans' heads, as they disputed the dominance of Boston sports teams. One guy told a young Boston fan that he was "only a sperm" the last time the Bruins won the Stanley Cup (1972). Another brought up "1986." Oh, that's a good one -- let's see, the Patriots were in the Super Bowl for the first time, the Celtics won the NBA championship for the 16th time, and the Red Sox were in the World Series. Yes, I guess that was a really crappy year. Another one brought up the Mets -- yes, the same Mets whose collapse at the end of the most recent season rivaled that of the 1978 Red Sox.

What is it about the hockey jersey that causes the wearer to believe that he is actually the person whose name is sewn onto the back, that he himself is in competition with the opposing team, that the hits and fights on the ice represent a call to him to intimidate, put down, hit and fight? I guess it must be the requisite alcohol that is downed upon donning the sacred garment. Or the nasty nature of tribalism -- if not for the abundance of resources and wealth in this country, would New Yorkers, Bostonians, and Philadelphians be slaughtering each other like Hutu, Tutsis, Serbs or Croats? This sub-species of human, the hockey fan (or is it just the overly trimmed young male?), ridicules his "opponent" at the faintest sign of softness, always projecting a tough, edgy, cynical image. I pity their girlfriends, doomed to breakup/divorce if they're lucky, or to a life of wondering why the fuck they don't leave this asshole. Seemingly self-confident, these guys prove the old adage that certitude does not equal certainty. Ugly Americans indeed.

The game itself was entertaining, ending up in a shootout with the Bruins winning (Update: the Bruins won the rematch today at MSG South). I think I'd rather stick to baseball from now on, and just watch the Bruins on TV. The fans at Fenway are no Sunday school teachers, but compared to a hockey game, it is better for the kids.